Two friends meet for lunch. When the other’s phone rings, her friend bites back a snarl. What could provoke such a response from an amiable woman? Well, we might have to edit the woman’s description a bit.

Of course, she can project sweetness, but a snarl fits her semi-pugnacious personality as well. You see, there are things she does not tolerate. And cell phones holding a place of honor on the table during an otherwise pleasant visit between friends is high on her list of reasons to growl.

The constant phone ringing issue bleeds into our leisure time, especially at home. Please join this writer for a glass of wine any evening. Before long, you will hear her growl, “Not again!”

If you wonder what raised the lady’s hackles? The answer, my friend, is the sound of the telephone’s incessant ringing.

For reasons we are not inclined to explain, this household has both a landline and a cell phone. Consequently, both telephones ring a lot. Sometimes a culprit calls the cell phone, and if no one answers, they immediately dial the landline. Or vice versa.

No entity reaps the benefits of offering everyone’s personal information more than several branches of the greedy government. Those insatiable merchants of our information remind this writer of a group of greedy aliens who inhabit the Star Trek universe, the Ferengi.

At the same time, when such private information occurs, countless troglodytes seeking to become parasitic members of the government promise to look into the troubling privacy matter. Of course, once they are in office, they develop a curious ailment known as campaign promise amnesia. This particular disease resurfaces every two, four, or six years, depending on what office the fibbers seek.

And through it all, the telephone never stops ringing. In minor election years, sales calls abound. If you ever made the mistake of donating to your university’s alumni association, they will hound you to the grave and beyond. The same is true of a plethora of culprits, such as your insurance or credit card companies who always seek to upsell.

Such companies are quite persistent. If they cannot reach you by one form or another of the blasted Edison machine, they flood your mailbox with letters telling you how much they care about you. Then, they suggest you purchase more of their product or upgrade what you now have.

Although there are countless credit card companies guilty of being such irritants, we noticed AAA is exceptionally persistent in their efforts to sell you their life insurance policy. And then, there are those ubiquitous mailings from AARP that miraculously appear a few years after puberty. What a waste of paper! Unless you save all such mailbox stuffers, the landfills tend to be the final resting place for them.

Of course, the main reason for the current ringing of the telephone is because it is a presidential election year. Most calls begin around breakfast time and do not cease until after ten o’clock at night.

Recently, this lady’s phone rang at six a.m. It was a call from some eager campaign acolyte. Even if the particular office seeker interested her, she took perverse pleasure in telling the caller she plans to vote for the other guy.

If at some point in your existence you aligned with either political party, then your party calls, often. Even after you move on to another parallel universe, the political calls never end.

Hubby, a more patient soul than his wife, would answer the phone and let the person spin their spiel. When the caller finished, Hubby told them he did not vote and hung up. He would not be able to play that game now because there is a troubling trend with those countless calls. Most of them are robot calls. Thus the fun of messing with the caller’s mind is lost in the technological universe.

On a particularly busy phone call day, this writer considered changing her party affiliation to Independent. But then both parties would diligently test her patience.

 

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